where were you when I was willing to say goodbye to everything (die)

I just don't feel affection for you anymore. You forgot me while I was in my worst state for months. Do you know how much I missed you during that time. A lot. A whole fucking lot. But that's over now. It's gone. Even though we saw each other and hugged unlike bros, That close friendship feeling that we used to have or that I used to feel is gone. Look at what He did, He made sure that I was not alone every night and he's miles away. Get the game on and play we're gonna get better at this, You and me. We never did though but damnit he made sure that I was always talking to someone when I was trapped under my own self, hiding in my room. He never asked what happened and I honestly don't want to tell everybody the story. This distance that we had did not keep us away. He's in another town and you're just a few miles away. But where were you when I just wanted to be completely gone. Just, There.